That Added a Whole New Meaning to “Lip Service”

 

Merriam – Webster                                                                                                                    Definition of Lip Service: an avowal or advocacy, adherence, or allegiance expressed in words but not backed by deeds – usually used with pay

Our country inaugurated a new president a week ago today. The following day there were Women’s Marches from Washington DC to communities and campuses around the United States and in different locations all over the globe. The following are some of my thoughts and observations.

I found the Pussyhat Project to be a well orchestrated and unifying gesture for the women who chose to attend marches or supported the concept of showing solidarity around the topic of women’s rights, through the creation and wearing of pink hats. I was in no way inspired by the numerous march attendees who opted to individually or in groups dress as enormous vaginas, appearing to be birthing full-grown adults. Though I imagine Hobby Lobby appreciated the high sales of varying shades of pink and lavender fabrics. If you’re feeling like being crafty for a cause I have a friend who’s looking for 300 baby blankets to take with her to Africa this spring and I also have a neighbor who can hook you up with a pillowcase pattern to make fun pillowcases for critically ill hospitalized children. Your local high school theater or show choir could also benefit from your handiwork.

In terms of not wanting to objectify women, I’m unclear as to how dressing like genitalia somehow takes the focus off of that. I will say that it was easy to divide the age of the costumed women by those who opted to crown their costumes with yarn and those who opted for a clean V. Though my own children are now adults, my personal litmus for politics is “will this be awkward to explain to a child?”. Before I had children, I gave little thought to such things but I have in a previous blog told the story of my son questioning why the show he was watching was interrupted and me needing to explain that the President was apologizing to the nation. His questions led to me having to further explain that he had previously lied to the country during a similar appearance. That was followed up by my “white lie” of “he kissed someone who wasn’t his wife”. My son was three in 1998 and I have never regretted not getting into the oral sex infidelities of the Commander in Chief at that time.We did discuss that childhood memory during a conversation from college earlier this week.

While pink hats convey a message which might be easily explained as  simply as “they are part of the same team”. The tawdry costumes sort of defy explanation. Most parents have taught their children to some degree that there are private parts of their body. Having grown adults parade around publicly dressed cartoon-like as those private parts seems to have no real benefit. Clearly these were not the marchers who were there because they were concerned about the environment, as I’m envisioning most of those are headed for landfills. Perhaps some will be sold on eBay “One slightly used Cooter. Best offer.” why not just use the same description from their online dating profile? Then there are also the proud women who think that these marches have the same significance as the marching of the suffragettes and will hang onto it for future generations. Fast-forward to 2110 “Mom, what is this?” and then the thoughtful explanation “That’s your great-grandmothers vagina that she packed in moth balls. She fondly talked about the importance of her work with fellow women at the time.” then the poor kid will be looking around for great-grandfather’s penis costume, because after all if the entire objective is equality, that only makes sense.

I have on occasion while writing my blog posted a bold prediction. My crystal ball is telling me that a college student or group of college students, perhaps even those participating in a Greek Life organization (fraternity/sorority) will be kicked out of school, placed on probation or summoned to the Dean’s Office after wearing the very same costume(s) on Halloween next year. It will be deemed as vulgar, inappropriate, objectifying. They will come back with the explanation that they were supporting women’s rights and likely they will be ridiculed and ostracized by various groups on campus. My crystal ball is getting foggy but some people after seeing fellow students in those costumes may need to seek out a safe place. If anything, the costumes struck me as a distraction from what many sincerely wanted to communicate. If all I have in common with you is shared anatomy, that’s not much to base a movement upon. Especially knowing that people of all genders, orientations, melanin content, faiths, abilities and education don’t necessarily share the same political views. When you are encouraging participation by people wearing hijabs for modesty, it seems downright intentionally offensive.

My political activism began as a 17-year-old high school student who was trained by the Minnesota Secretary of State to register voters. The first campaign I worked on was while in college during a fellow students failed attempt to win a seat on the City Council. During caucuses I typically am either the convener or the secretary for my precinct. I serve as an Assistant Head Election Judge in the county where I live. I get one vote, just like everyone else.

I’ll be the first to admit that this most recent presidential election was unlike any other I have witnessed in my lifetime. While the Bush vs Gore election left us wondering who our president would be for an extended period of time, I think the most shocking election result while I’ve been politically active was the Minnesota Governor’s race where former Vice President Hubert H. Humphrey’s son Skip ran against the party switching St. Paul Mayor Norm Coleman and they were both defeated by former Navy Seal and All-Star Wrestler Jesse “The Body” Ventura. Minnesota is politically fickle, consistently liberal and is the only state who garnered electoral college votes for favorite son, former Vice President Walter Mondale who was soundly defeated by Ronald Reagan.

Something that I think has changed within my lifetime is how voters respond to a loss by their candidate. I feel that perhaps we are reaping the results of a generation raised to not compete (not keeping score during childhood games) and unable to graciously concede. There is an art to losing gracefully, it has to be developed.  West St. Paul native Harold Stassen serves as a fine example of a Minnesotan who recognized that one does not have to quit simply because they don’t achieve what they desire. Politically successful as the Governor of Minnesota and the only person to ever hold the title Director of the US Foreign Operations Administration (a post that existed during a portion of the Eisenhower administration) his efforts to win his party’s endorsement as a Presidential candidate failed nine times. From 1944 when my father was in junior high and my mother was in elementary school and every four years all the way up until 1992 when I was a parent myself, he threw his hat in the ring.

As I’ve blogged about before, I am a political junky. I watch the conventions of both major parties. I enjoy the debates. I watch news programs and enjoy reading the paper. I love discussions and will call into question a social media post of a friend if I’m unclear on what their point is. I made a discovery only recently when taking a CareerCode Inventory (a job-focused version of the Holland Code) that identified me with a trait most do not have. A skill of my type is the capacity to “See every side of a story”.  Seeing this in my detailed code description, I realized that my friends aren’t intentionally being obtuse, they actually don’t possess the ability necessary to easily see something from a perspective other than the one they identify with. While fiscally conservative and socially more centrist in a liberal state, I am accustomed to having my opinions vilified. Minnesota prides itself on high voter turnout, I have often said that it’s more important for informed voters to vote. As my own children began voting, I recommended they select a few offices and learn about those candidates and choose based on their values who to support and if they didn’t want to learn about the judges, or school board or council members that was okay. Other than when casting a straw vote during caucuses, or during a primary to determine who is on the ticket, I have never felt an obligation to vote a straight party ticket.

Over the years I have had many friends tell me that they “aren’t interested in politics” as though they are picking an interest like sports or theater. One can live without attending a play or following an athletic franchise. Politics are more like oxygen, they impact your quality of life. While this most recent presidential election pulled some people into political activism, it seems that the aftermath is what has really mobilized people who had perhaps not engaged in politics much before. So an election which most Americans were looking forward to getting over and done with has polarized citizens in the aftermath more than during the campaign itself. If that can be done in a respectful way, that strikes me as a win. Having citizens engage may be something that had been set aside with the increase of more couples both working, a greater number of single parents and perhaps a more mobile citizenry. Perhaps it’s the result of taking Civics classes out of schools and people not fully grasping the concept of a “Government of the people, by the people, for the people…”.

Many of my friends participated in the Women’s March the day following the Trump inauguration. Friends from elementary school showed up in my Facebook feed, some marching with their husbands, others marching with their daughters. Due to the turnouts, most weren’t actually marching at all but were gathered with others, some in the pink hats, others holding signs. There were friends I attended high school and college with. Still more proudly sharing where their college-aged students were marching. A former supervisor of mine posted locations across the country where various members of her family were peacefully participating. My favorite was a college friend who posted a picture of his daughter, a high school senior who organized the “Girl Up Women’s Walk” before school at the American School of Doha that drew 250 participants. I watched portions of the DC event via CNN.

In nearly every post that I saw and every video that I watched the participants appeared to be having a great time. They looked happy, much like people look when attending a music festival or large sporting event. The two exceptions were the arrest of a moronic counter-protester in St. Paul and a video of a Trump supporter having her hair lit on fire at one of the rally locations. Both appeared to be isolated incidents that did not reflect the congenial attitudes of most of the participants.

The messages and reason for participation seemed as varied as the participants. Some stated they were there because they were anti-Trump. Others expressed concern for the environment. Some were asking who the Democrats would have running in 2020, having me hope that EITHER party put forth legislation with some limitation on campaign length, as financially and emotionally these two-year campaigns are not helping the country! There were people concerned about health care, others about LGBTQ issues. Scarlett Johansson and others spoke about Planned Parenthood.

I chose not to go, because despite the name Women’s March there were clearly opinions and values held by many women that were not welcome. I have never thought that an aspect of my anatomy informs my opinions on topics. While I am much more in favor of being “for” something than “anti” something I didn’t feel any real compelling reason to engage on that particular day, in that format. I am someone who has always volunteered, financially supported and contributed to causes and ideals that I believe in. I was pleased to see the freedoms of Americans being exercised, as they are protected. There are many things that I personally oppose, that I have no issue with others being in favor of, that’s what makes America a great country and unlike many others. I think the benefit of such large-scale gathering is that a percentage of those participating may follow-through and engage in supporting causes in their communities. Others admittedly were there simply to get a look at it, or feared they would be missing out on what might be an historic event if they did not attend, or succumbed to the peer pressure of others. Some felt angry and scared and wanted to be enveloped by a group of like-minded individuals. The reasons people chose to participate are as legitimate as the reasons other chose not to.

Many of my friends who participated are educators, nonprofit workers, attorneys and others in positions that are committed to the care of people of all ages and capabilities. Whether through their work, religious activities or simply in their own homes I would estimate that everyone that I personally know who participated or supported the efforts of the Marches is a compassionate person who has legitimate concerns. I would also describe the people I know who avoided the events in the same way.

I found most of the signs to be sincere, clever (“I’m with Her” with arrows pointing in all directions was a popular one) and legible. I will admit the ones that caught my eyes were the ones that can best be described as vulgar, distasteful and some that were just outright confusing. Seriously, if your “menstrual blood is going to flow through the streets” for any cause, you need to see a physician. To put little girls in Hello Kitty costumes and put signs on their backs about not touching their pussies, is about as appropriate as having the same girls dress as pole dancers for Halloween. I’m never in favor of using ones children to further a cause. It’s like putting a tattoo on a child, that’s a personal choice that they should be mature enough to make an informed decision about. One should never make assumptions about their child’s sexuality or political affiliation being the same as their own.

Those are my thoughts. I could have put them on a sign and met up with my friends to share some of them. With social media, there are much easier methods of conveying our messages to people throughout the country and around the world. A luxury the women who fought for our right to vote did not have. One of the great parts of being an American is that we don’t have to agree, with each other, with the president, with our neighbor. We’re not a homogeneous nation. We never have been and it’s doubtful we ever will be. I am mindful that many don’t agree with me and I respect and defend the right of others to peacefully share their message as well. In regards to “Lip Service”, time will be the measure as to if the words are backed by deeds.

Insulting Voters for Political Gain and Other 2016 Strategies

While it has been nearly two weeks since our caucuses in Minnesota, I find myself still fascinated by the often conflicted interpretation of events surrounding the rallies preceding primaries in other states. For those not from here, a brief tutorial on Minnesota politics; we are the state that had a former pro wrestler elected as an Independent to serve as governor, we are remembered as the only blue state on the map during the 1984 Presidential race and earlier this month we allocated the majority of delegates to Bernie Sanders and Marco Rubio for their respective parties. As a fiscally conservative and socially more liberal voter, I find I have to rely upon other states every four years to get my favored candidate their chair in the Oval Office. Currently this method has worked half of the time, November 2016 will be a tie breaker.

I am not trying to convince anyone to get behind a specific individual, my chance to support a candidate in making it to the ballot has passed. I am however asking people to take a step back and evaluate the sources of some of the most illogical reasoning and intelligence insulting media I have ever seen. I have shared with a new generation of voters, that to me this is the most divided I have seen this country since 1968. Issues which I thought had become non-issues, negativity and hatred I had believed were quelled are percolating. There is a great deal of dissatisfaction and that is being used by all sides in an attempt to persuade voters. When Secret Service agents jumped a protestor attempting to get to the candidate at a Trump event in Ohio over the weekend the individual identified himself as a Bernie supporter. When Trump publicly stated that Bernie supporters were part of the problem, Bernie denied it. All one needed to do was look at the Chicago Tribune which posted protestors at Trump’s event in Illinois on Friday, Bernie signs and buttons shown prominently. I find it hard to believe that there were no photographs of supporters for the other Republican candidates (who vocally oppose Trump) who came out or Hillary campaigners who attended. Did the Chicago Tribune opt to only show Bernie supporters or is that truly all who came to protest? Meanwhile MoveoOn.Org wishes to take credit for the Chicago rally being canceled.

One of the angles I find most interesting is that people want to call Trump a bully for his commentary but these same sources wish to goad him by saying he is too scared to stand up to ISIS if he can’t stand up to protestors in Chicago. Is that not considered bullying as well? They want to make him responsible for the actions of an attendee at one of his events (a 78 year old man punching a disruptive protestor who is being removed) but wish to take no claim for the bleeding head of a police officer during their “peaceful” protest. In all honesty, Trump’s insight and desire to not have a full-blown riot represent perhaps the most presidential thing that I have seen him do thus far. I personally don’t think Trump is any more or less responsible for his audience members behavior than Bernie is for his supporter trying to jump Donald. I however am a believer in personal accountability, an old-fashioned notion to many.

Those who went to protest and antagonize might have been disappointed that the event didn’t erupt into something uglier. Disappointingly, candidates from both parties used the situation to try to bolster their own standings. As though somehow a person’s opposition being uncivil should garner support for that opposition. It seems apparent that the protestors failed to give much thought regarding that in addition to  Trump supporters, there were  many others there simply to listen to him prior to making their decision. Just like the kid in the viral video last week, it’s disappointing when you plan to go somewhere and end up somewhere else. While some might not like it, a Trump rally is no broccoli farm but the protestors turned it into a circus! Rally attendees didn’t get to see and listen to Trump and protestors didn’t get to be part of an epic riot. Link to video: http://mashable.com/2016/03/08/broccoli-farm-circus-video/#LH9Z_UTDesqJ

My husband (who did not attend a caucus and has not declared support for any candidate) found himself playing devil’s advocate over the weekend via Facebook with a high school classmate. When she ran out of factual claims to back her opinion she retaliated with “I know of no intelligent people who support Trump.” I asked my husband if she still lived in Le Sueur (the town they attended high school in) which she does. Having been to Le Sueur many times during my marriage I realize that if you were not to leave town (population 4000) you would likely miss out on much of the diversity the world has to offer. Despite whatever your political views regarding him might be, I would be hard pressed to claim that Dr. Ben Carson who endorsed Trump last week is not intelligent. Such is the rhetoric this election cycle.

Over the past few years I have noticed methods of trying to garner political support that I don’t recall while growing up. I think that this approach is actually a contributing factor to the divisiveness which seems more apparent in our current race. It began with the vilifying of “The one percent”. Those who were raised trying to win with a roll of the dice in Monopoly were being told that people who achieved what was once referred to as the “American Dream” are somehow inherently evil. Mathematically you can at least understand why a party or candidate might choose this particular tactic, an “us” against “them” with the risk of only alienating 1% of the population and perhaps gaining new ground with the other 99%. Take a look at the German census in 1933 and you will see that is the approximate percentage of people identifying as Jewish that year. So despite my personally not being accustomed to this sort of political practice, it’s not a new one. Blame a small minority.

The most recent version of this which I find even more bizarre is the polls showing that Donald Trump is leading among the “uneducated”. This is likely the talking point my husband’s classmate was attempting to utilize. One news source reporting the poll results with the dire statement “Donald Trump supporters did not have a very flattering picture painted of them by a new poll”. The qualification for “educated” was actually college and in a numbers game using that criteria, 68% of Americans are “uneducated”, that’s enough to win any election. What people were attempting to elude to is that the supporters lacked intelligence. Those reporting either lacked the education or intelligence to recognize those aren’t the same thing. At the same time we have candidates running on the promise of providing free public education, this holds less value to the already educated and it would seem obvious that insulting those who have not chosen or been given the opportunity for higher education is a bad campaign strategy.

While I have a bachelor’s degree I know many highly intelligent people who do not. Having worked among college students for over twenty-five years I also know many people who are not the most intelligent who do have degrees. I am the grandchild of an Irish immigrant whose formal education ended at the eighth grade, he arrived in the United States at nineteen. By the time he retired he was the Vice President of Foreign Marketing for Pillsbury. My recently deceased father in law also dropped out of school to assist his father in running the family farm. Only after a brother who remained in school got TB (forcing him to remain home) did he ask his father if he could return to school. He graduated from high school, went to college, had a career in the Air Force and returned to school for another degree upon retirement. While his opportunity for an education made him more educated, he was no more intelligent than he would have been if he had stayed on the farm. Walt Disney did alright despite leaving school at 16, Wolfgang Puck left school in Austria at 14, Milton Hershey had a fourth grade education and Henry Ford didn’t go to college. John D. Rockefeller Sr. dropped out of high school  and Andrew Carnegie’s formal education ended in elementary school but access to reading materials to self-educate himself led to him contributing to the construction of 2509 libraries throughout the world. Some of our best known fast food and franchise developers either did not finish high school or attend college; Colonel Sanders (KFC), Ray Kroc (McDonalds), Dave Thomas (Wendy’s), Debbi Fields (Mrs. Fields Cookies) and many others. I write this across the room from a framed Ansel Adams poster and the beauty of the photograph is not sullied by him being a high school dropout. When I stay at a Holiday Inn, I am not negatively impacted by the founders lack of a high school diploma. Next time you see a Frank Lloyd Wright designed building perhaps you will recall that it was designed by someone who never attended high school. Locally, the founder of Best Buy did not go to college. For a truly inspiring read I encourage you to look into Rob Kalin the founder of Etsy and his educational path after flunking out of high school, too much good stuff to summarize here. Abraham Lincoln and Andrew Jackson also fall into the “uneducated” classification; intelligent enough to be president, just not educated enough to choose one, some imply.

I’m not suggesting that all of these “uneducated” people I’ve profiled are Trump supporters, typically the Democrats garner more of the deceased votes (that’s sarcasm, for those who don’t know me well). I am simply pointing out that the implication that education somehow makes a person superior or that lack of education should be something to be ashamed of is just as demeaning as being dismissive of an individual based upon their faith, where they live, their skin color or any other identifying characteristic of birth or personal choice.

So for those of you who are still in a position to make a decision, I encourage you to do what you believe is right for your country and not simply your current situation. Sometimes it is tempting to find a quick-fix appealing and not think about the long range impact. When the media is telling you loudly who is being a bully, step back and question if their very method of reporting isn’t bullying itself. If you are being instructed to be against a percentage of the population, take time to evaluate if that is a construct you are comfortable with. If you are being told that you are better than some other group of voters based on some arbitrary criteria, it’s a good idea to to take stock of your values and also the values of the candidate or media source who is trying to win over voters by telling them they are superior. Really? When it comes down to it we each get one vote in November. Why is that?

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.” -Declaration of Independence